R-E-S-P-E-C-T

I’ve just had one of those moments where I can finally put something that I’ve felt for a long time into words.

I’ve felt a general unease around certain individuals who’ve made various comments about gay people like myself. The comments haven’t necessarily been nasty or cutting (although sometimes they have) but are often quite condescending and patronising.

The ‘I hope God helps you poor gay people’ attitude.

Which is why I’ve found refreshing the approach taken by Andrew Marin of www.themarinfoundation.org

http://www.themarinfoundation.org/mp3/March02.2006.WYLLScottThomas.mp3

He’s a heterosexual (not ‘ex-gay’) man who’s taken it upon himself to establish a respectful dialogue between the gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender community and the Christian community.

And I underscore the word ‘respectful’.

Because that’s what I now see has been missing from the mindset of many of the Christians and many of the pastors that I’ve encountered over the years.

For example.

Geoff Bullock recently ministered in word and music at Sydney’s Metropolitan Community Church. Clearly, he had respect for the gay people in attendance. There was no patronising people with an ‘I’m here to help the unlovely heathen’ attitude.

I contrast that with some of Geoff’s (former) Hill$ong contemparies who clearly don’t have any respect for gay people. And it shows. Whenever there is a clear opportunity for compassion, the Hill$ong crowd and their ilk go strangely mute.

Mind you, I don’t think that’s necessarily a gay thing. Hill$ong seems to use, abuse and exploit its own people with gay abandon and without a hint of respect or conscience.

Anyway, I’m sitting here, on a rare weekend off work, and wondering what church I could visit in Perth tomorrow.

I’ve felt like I was going mad. I’d think about attending a particular church, and then have a real gut feeling that I shouldn’t go.

I couldn’t put my finger on why, and then I listened to Andrew Marin respectfully talk about gay people, and realised that’s the missing ingredient.

Church leaders in Perth don’t respect gay people.

All Perth church leaders?

Pretty much.

I mean St. Andrew’s Anglican Church in Subiaco has a specific service for GLBT people on Sunday nights, and when I visited there once, I felt quite at ease. But they’re the exception.

Straight-afterwards (because of different starting times) I went around the corner to Subiaco Church of Christ and felt ill at ease the moment I walked in the door.

Oh, they certainly tolerate gay people, and can put on a smiling face and be polite in a nice Churches of Christ way, but I think that’s a lot way short of respecting gay people.

Am I wrong? Well, Graham only has to get up on stage on a Sunday and clearly show that I’m wrong. Don’t think though that’ll be happening anytime soon.

I think the difference between Christians who tolerate and respect gay people is that the ones who respect gay people will go the extra mile to understand the issues facing gay people; what to say, what not to say..etc.

And that’s important, because years ago I reached a point where I became tired of adjusting to accommodate their idiosyncracies and conservative mindset, without them doing any thinking all about what I’m thinking and feeling.

I’m not saying it should all revolve around me, and my gay issues. I’m just suggesting that Christians do what Andrew Marin does and have a little (or preferably a lot of) respect for gay people.

Interestingly, Jesus Christ showed much respect to ‘sexual sinners’ who had not earned that respect.

Unfortunately, such a life example appears to be too difficult for many Christians and pastors to follow.

I suspect I will sit at home tomorrow, and have my faith boosted by Andrew Marin’s respectful online messages, rather than be ’tolerated’ at a Perth church gathering, where deep down they can’t wait to see the back of the problem poof who puts them in an uncomfortable situation.

If you’re a Christian, I’ll ask you straight out.

Do you respect gay people?

 

P.S. This post was shithouse because I haven’t written anything for weeks and I’m struggling to get my thoughts on paper. See? I even stuffed that up because I’m not writing on paper but typing on a screen. Geez.